I was looking through instagram the other night. I don’t often go back and reminisce, but I found myself enjoying watching Audrey grow up (or more accurately, grow down). As I was scrolling from top to bottom, I would click on random pictures to examine them more deeply; almost as if to linger a little longer on the memory that accompanied the image. When I reached the various ones from early 2017, I stopped. And as I thought about it, there was a lot of life that has happened in the last 2 years. There were so many smiles. So much laughter. Moments that we will cherish forever - social media is good for that: reminding you of the life that you’re in, but not always present for. The days are long. So very long. But the years are really so short. And I know that’s cliche, but it’s the truth.
I know that the sorrow that came after George’s diagnosis and death has placed a cloud over all of the parts of our lives. The good, the bad, and the ugly, are all tainted because of that sorrow. I’ve read the sentiment that you don’t get over a loss like this, you get through it; you learn to live life differently. To enjoy things differently. To breathe differently. Its absolutely true. But the sorrow doesn’t mean that life can’t still be good. That there can’t still be genuine joy. Those pictures on my social media profile prove it. The laughter and smiles are real. The joy and excitement from things as little as splashing in the kiddie pool in the summer sun are real. The big things are there too. Forever cemented in images are the memories of birthday celebrations, easter egg hunts, and christmas dinners. Its interesting that those are the memories that stick out to me… they are all celebrations of life. LIFE! Not death. Not sorrow. Not pain. {though easter has a side of it where death is an important thing} Life. Another year older. A resurrection that defeated death. A newborn King. We’ve celebrated so many things in these 2 years, and even though they have been without our son, they have been really great. A testament to our God’s glory and His continued promise to sustain us.
I don’t always see it when I’m in the middle of these long days, but as I look back over the last 2 years, I’m so thankful for all the ways that my God has shown his love for this family.
